Dear Little One,
You are the size of a plum! It is almost the 2nd trimester! this means (hopefully) less food/smell aversions, sickness, and more energy! This also means we told all of our family and friends about you (aka. Facebook “official”)! For the first time I got to celebrate mother’s day not only for all the mamas I look up to, but for this new special family I treasure. Nic told everyone “there have only been a few times in my life when my wife has left me speechless. The first was when I saw her walking down the aisle at our wedding. the second was when she told me I was going to be a dad.” Now, I am pretty sure I scarred him speechless with my peppiness when we first met and maybe a few times when arguing haha… let’s be real, no one is perfect! But wow your father is a special person. He tries to rub my belly and give you a kiss or two, often when I am grumpy and tired. His sweet actions towards you make up for all the moodiness you and I have been going through together.
We have a lot to learn but his pure joy reminds me, that through the good and bad, this family will be pure joy… always.
Tuesday, May 16 (Week 12)
Dear Little One,
What a whirl wind it has been recently.
I am constantly thinking… even in my sleep! I had a dream recently that I was in the car talking to someone about life and then I just started crying because someone said your dad was getting deployed soon. For most of my life, I have not been one to let out tears (especially for the little things), but recently I let tears flow for everything. I am sure it has to do with the hormones in my body that are constantly changing, but I also believe at a certain point in life you have to realize showing emotion can take more strength than trying to wrap it up. So now, I am feeling everything magnified. I heard your heart beat at the doctor’s again and let my heart flutter as they told me you are healthy. Instead of feeling down when struggling to find excitement in Alabama, I use these emotions as motivation to do what I love. Some days this means writing for myself, readers & you my little one. On other days, I create & try new things to experience something everyday!
You may grow up but there will always be more to learn. These experiences are what make people so interesting. Everyone has their own story with passions, failures, and successes. You are my success no matter what. Your father and I may not always be able to give you everything but we will provide the love you need to see this world for what it is… beautiful. If we can’t afford a beach house, we will go camping right next to the waves. If we can’t afford multiple plain tickets to visit family, we will have crazy road trips where you constantly ask “are we there yet?” and if you want a pony or a spaceship, we will teach you how to use your imagination… how to play for hours just dreaming.
This life will lead in all different directions, and I am not sure where our family will end up as time moves forward, but I do know we will end up seeing your little face come November.
PS: I gardened for the first time since middle school! It has been something I have wanted to do for awhile and I just randomly decided to go for it! I think the combo of florals turned out really lovely… now I am just trying to keep them alive haha ❤
Sunday, May 21st (Week 13)